God

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God
God Image.png
Yahweh
Allah
Birthday '
From '
Height '
Weight '

Debut Match
God L
Pin
Aniki
8chanmania XXVII
First Victory

[[]]
First Championship

[[]]


God is the deity of the Abrahamic religions, including Judaism, Christianity, and Islam.

Bio[edit | edit source]

Way back in the Bronze age, the early Israelites still were a polytheistic people that worshiped a multitude of different Semitic/Mesopotamian gods, comparable to the Greek or the Egyptian pantheon. Among these cults of deities such as Asherah (i.e. Ishtar, i.e. Inanna) and Baal (yes, that Baal) was one particular cult worshiping a figure called Yahweh. Through the combined force of faith, politics, and religious violence, the followers of Yahweh eventually stopped the worship of all other deities and established a long, healthy tradition of monotheism. Hence, the Jews.

This new system worked well enough for a couple of centuries, but by around 0 AD., society changed. People no longer wanted the cruel, jealous god of the Old Testament; but a kind, loving father. Conveniently enough, some cult leader called Jesus Christ showed up and claimed to be the son of exactly that father. In stomps Christianity, the Holy Trinity, and a soft reboot of polytheism via the cult of saints. Five-hundred years latter, some Arab guy (PBUH) decided Jesus was right about god, but most certainly wasn't right about being his son. In barge the Muslims.

Assuming God exists, he must be in despair. Then again, all he has to work with is a horde of positively homicidal chimps. One can only feel sorry for him.

In 8chanmania[edit | edit source]

God's sole appearance was in 8chanmania XXVII, where he fought Aniki over his sinful homosexuality. How or why Aniki won the match sparked an immense theological debate among the audience, but it was ultimately decided that God intentionally allowed Aniki - not because he was gay, but because he was cool gay like Freddie Mercury.

Trivia[edit | edit source]

  • As no-one can decide how God looks like, his fighter edit was designed to be completely invisible.