8chanmania XCVIII
8chanmania XCVIII | |||||||
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Final Final Chance | |||||||
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8chanmania XCVIII was the 32nd Mania of 8chanmania: Season 3 and the 98th mania in total. It was the last final chance tag team mania, meaning only fighters who were in before were eligible for nomination, and made it the absolutely last chance to qualify for the grand finals of 8chanmania XCIX.
Due to its length, 8chanmania XCVIII was split up in two parts - the preliminaries took part on July 12th, while the rest of the mania took place on July 19th.
Roster[edit | edit source]
- TEAM WEABOO VILLAINS: Bondrewd and Hisoka Morow - Made in Abyss / Hunter X Hunter
- TEAM SAVING THE SHOTA: 9S and Haze with Chris Hansen Manager - NieR: Automata / Anonymous Agony / To Catch a Predator
- TEAM MOUNTING TENSION: Mount Your Friends Guy and Stork - Mount Your Friends / Caligula Overdose
- TEAM DIMENSIONAL SINK: The Nameless One and Xavier with Morte Manger - Planescape:Torment / Xavier: Renegade Angel
- TEAM OWW THE EDGE: Caim and Madara Uchiha - Drakengard / Naruto
- TEAM BETRAYED LOVE: George Constanza and Tomoko Kuroki - Seinfeld / Watamote
- TEAM KWEEN'S KOMMANDO: Ugandan Knuckles and REDACTED - Uganda / Too Many Cooks
- TEAM CRANK HARDER: Roy & Alma - Magical Truck Adventure
- TEAM GALACTIC HEROES: Yang Wen-li & Walter von Schönkopf - The Legend of Galactic Heroes
- TEAM FAGGOT CAT: Neco-Arc & Cheshire Cat - Nasuverse / Monster Girl Encyclopedia
- TEAM SUPERNATURAL SEX: Kyu & Clyde - HuniePop / Pac-Man
- TEAM EXTREME GOLFING: Plum & Gene Yuss - Mario Golf
- TEAM GENTLEMAN THIEVES: Phantom R & Lupin III - Rhythm Thief & The Emperor's Treasure / Lupin III
- TEAM ROKK AND ROLL: 80s Noise Marine & Goff Rokka - Warhammer 40.000
- TEAM KILLER CLEANERS: Derek Baum & Bob C. Leaner - The Peter Serafinowicz Show / Serial Cleaner
- TEAM MEN AMONGST MEN: Kenshiro & Kazuma Kiryu - Fist of the North Star / Yakuza
- TEAM DANCING DEAD: Duane! & Disco Hitler with Scatman and Buane! Managers - Too many to count
- TEAM RESIDENT BREEDERS: Chris Redfield & Leon Kennedy - Resident Evil
- TEAM TEXAN TROUBLE: Bobby Hill & Hank Hill - King of the Hill
- TEAM GACHI: Aniki & Van Darkholme - Gachimuchi
- TEAM NANOMACHINE MUSCLE: Abby Anderson & Senator Armstrong - The Last of Us II / Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance
- TEAM ROUNDHOUSE LADDER: Chuck Norris & Jackie Chan Tulpa - Real-life martial artist / Your Subconsciousness
- TEAM SHARING IS CARING: Chaika Trabant & Adolf Hitler - Your Local Share Thread
- TEAM LEGAL MAYHEM: Miles Edgeworth & Dick Gumshoe - Phoenix Wright
- TEAM SPOOKY ALIEN TITS: Hex Maniac & Big Tiddy Tau - Pokemon X & Y / Warhammer 40,000
- TEAM BURGER: American Bear & Alasgan Bear - Your local WalMart
- TEAM PLANET TRIBES: WWEW Soldier & Blood Eagle - Planetside 2 / Tribes
- TEAM WYLDE RIDE: Kurt Wylde & Captain Falcon R - Acceleracers / FEAR / F-Zero
- TEAM WITCH HUNT: Beatrice & The Batter (originally Battler Ushiromiya) - Umineko no Naku Koro Ni / OFF
- TEAM /V-B/: Punished /v/ & /b/rotha with Vivian James Manager - 4chan / 8chan
- TEAM DEBT SLAVE: Gintoki Sakata & Dunpan - Gintama / PRÖÖÖÖ :DDD
- TEAM MEGAMI TENSEI: Dagda & Demifiend - Shin Megami Tensei IV: Apocalypse / Shin Megami Tensei III: Nocturne
Bracket[edit | edit source]
Side Matches[edit | edit source]
- Chris Redfield vs Albert Wesker in a cage match with unintentional SWA rules - Wesker wins first round, Chris wins second round and, somehow, the match (despite of it being supposed to go for more).
- Kyu & Neco-Arc vs Bob (Animal Crossing) & Cheshire Cat in a cage match - Neco-Arc gets pinned by Cheshire Cat. Bob and Cheshire Cat recruited into Nyankuza by Cat in the Ring.
- Jackie Chan Tulpa & Chuck Norris vs Godzilla & Giant Enemy Crab - Jackie KO's Godzilla, Enemy Crab taps out to Chuck
Finals[edit | edit source]
- Gintoki Sakata VS Dunpan - Dunpan wins via pin
Aftershow Matches[edit | edit source]
- Yang Wen-li & Walter von Schönkopf vs King Harkinian & Link - Walter von Schönkopf taps out against a Nightmare of Dr. Linkbotnik
- Martellus & Indrick Boreale vs Goff Rokka & 80s Noise Marine - Goff Rokka wins via pin against Martellus
- Hank Hill & Bobby Hill vs Horatio & Horatio - Hank wins against Horatio via pinfall
Story Segment 1: Villainous Vaudeville[edit | edit source]
Intro[edit | edit source]
After a certain someone had the bright idea of turning all the fancy mods on the mania off and on again during 8chanmania XCVII, villains from all the previous 97 manias had been flooding the event en mass. Even Tetsuya Nomura showed up to announce Ansem could totally take over the mania through a bit of time travel, but Deffy fortunately shouted him out of the commentary booth before he could turn the idea into a new Square Enix game.
Oddly enough, however, all those villains apparently were quite content to take their place among the audience and simply watch the mania unfold, allowing the last tag-team event of the Mania to unfurl to start without any major interruptions.
Side Match 1: The Nyankuza and the Adult Industry[edit | edit source]
Just after Cheshire Cat and Neco-Arc were defeated by Roy & Alma, the two cats were contacted by the mysterious Cat on a Ring. The feline explained all of the other catgirl-themed fighters participating in Season 3 were part of the Nyankuza; the Japanese cat mafia that would cut off one of your nine lives instead of one of your ten fingers if you messed up. It also explained that it wanted to recruit them.
But this was easier said than done, for the cat was not the only party with its eyes right on the pussy: With an enormous moan, Kyu stormed right into the ring and claimed the two girls as hers. Neko-Arc was so impressed that she promptly switched sides; forcing the Cat on a Ring to send in a cat in a vaguely homoerotic dress to back up Cheshire Cat in the ensuing two-on-two cage match.
The four of them fought like cats and dogs (minus the dogs), but ultimately, the Nyankuza stood triumphant. Problem was, the Cat on a Ring could not really introduce Cheshire Cat to the Nyankuza while she still was in the cage, and Cheshire could not escape the cage because her sheer bust size made climbing a wire fence troublesome. With a sigh of resignation, the Cat on a Ring set out to find someone who had a spare ladder or two.
Side Match 2: Residental Evil[edit | edit source]
Following their defeat against Senator Armstrong and Abby Anderson, Chris Redfield still tried to talk Leon Kennedy into expanding the Redfield bloodline. The latter's stern refusal was soon diverted when they ran into Albert Wesker, who had just returned from the corndog stand. Since Chris and Wesker had a bit of an unfinished business, they decided to dish it out there and then - except TNA Anon accidentally set up the fight under SWA Rules.
SWA (Spike Wrestling Assosciation) essentially is a mixed Wrestling-MMA homebrew ruleset from the developers of Fire Pro Wrestling World that prohibits regular pinfalls or submission victories, so only a KO or keeping the opponent out of the ring for ten seconds would win the match. Wesker did exactly that by yeeting Redfield over the ropes in the first match, but lost the subsequent battle after Redfield knocked his lights out.
Side Match 3: A Call from the 80s[edit | edit source]
After losing their match to the insane fighting spirit of Kazuma Kiryu, Chuck Norris and the Jackie Chan Tulpa were left wandering the facility. It was then that the Tulpa sensed "TRABBU" coming straight towards them, and said "TRABBU" turned out to be nothing less than Godzilla and the Giant Enemy Crab - a parting gift from Albert Wesker, who was no longer in any condition to keep a leash over his experimental specimen.
It goes beyond saying that the two kaiju were royally screwed, as the tulpa had a ladder and Chuck Norris was Chuck Norris. As a result, the tulpa KO'd Godzilla, while the giant crustacean fell to a pinfall of the Texas Ranger.
Story Segment 2: But Wait, It Gets Worse![edit | edit source]
Janitor No More[edit | edit source]
After Gintoki Sakata and his buddy Dunpan won the mania, the two came to a startling realization: There was only one belt, but two fighters standing. Though distraught by the need to battling each other, Sakata and Dunpan both gave out a hearty "PRÖÖÖÖ :DD" before they launched themselves into battle; culminating in a titanic match between an elephant and his hoodlum samurai sidekick.
Though the match ended when Dunpan launched a successful pinfall on Gintoki, the frienship between the unlikely couple proved to be stronger than any of the powerbombs Dunpan put on Gintoki, and they were last seen walking off into the sunset.
One Exterminatus Wasn't Enough[edit | edit source]
Still suspicious about any trace of Heresy within the mania after already having dropped the hammer once, Captain Indrick Boreale and Tech Marine Martellus investigate the grounds of the facility, and promptly run into the 80s Noise Marine and the Goff Rokka. Their attempt to purge the heretic and the xenos backfired, as the latter not only defeated them, but also went on to play a guitar combo of such catastrophic noises levels that even the superhuman fortitude of the Space Marines could not withstand it.
The Legend of Galactic Kings[edit | edit source]
At the insistence of Walter von Schönkopf, Yang Wen-li reluctantly decides to try out the local cuisine and lines up in front of the corndog stall. What should have been a mercifully quick affair takes a turn for the worse when King Harkinian decided that waiting in line was for peasants and brusquely moved past them. Not one for taking slights, Schönkopf drags Wen-li into battle, while Harkinian unleashes Dr. Robotnik in a CDI Link Costume.
The latter proves so unnerving that Admiral Yang ends up tapping out in a submission hold, and a smug King Harkinian orders The Prince to roll off with an entire SCHIFF-load of Corndogs.
That Horatio Ain't Right[edit | edit source]
Also attending the corn dog stall were Hank and Bobby Hill. The Texan's attempt to get a bit ran into a slight bit of trouble when both of them disappeared in an alien abduction beam and found themselves upon the ship of Horatio the First - who promptly proceeded to steal Bobby's purse. Reasonably upset, Hank and Bobby decided to open a whole tank of pro-pain upon the bald freak, while Horatio called in yet another Horatio to fight by his side.
Next thing you know, Hank Hill got a proper pinfall against aforementioned clone, while Bobby Hill had grabbed Horatio Prime right by the Horatios. Fearing for the loss of his reproductive potential, a high-pitched Horatio ordered his clone to send the two Texans back to Earth, and the Hill family found itself back in front of the corndog stall.
Trivia[edit | edit source]
- Beatrice was presumably meant to fight alongside her long-term plaything Battler Ushiromiya, but a typo in the team's nomination and TNA Anon being thoroughly done with Umineko meant she was assigned The Batter as her teammate instead.
- Kiryu singlehandled won against both Chuck Norris and the Jackie Chan Tulpa after Chuck previously KO'd his partner Kenshiro. The fucking madman.
- Bobby Hill landed a crit on Kazuma Kiryu an entire 48 seconds after the beginning of their match. Fucking magnets.