Bonzi
| Bonzi | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
Bonzi was the infamously obnoxious gorilla mascot and on-screen avatar for the heap of spyware known as BonziBuddy.
Bio[edit | edit source]
In the age of yore, when the internet was still young and people got their malware by clicking on a fancy banner promising 50 FREE SCREENSAVERS!!!' instead of pirating Netflix series, a company named Bonzi Software Inc. introduced BonziBuddy. The world was changed forever.
On the paper, BonziBuddy was meant to serve as an Office Assistant comparable to Microsoft's own Clippy. Which, given Clippy's own reputation, already would have been a bad idea to begin with. In practice, its intended function was to sneakily install a backdoor Trojan on the system; happily harvesting user data, adding a Bonzi-sponsored search bar to your browser, and popping up ad messages that deceptively looked line Windows system alerts.
To add insult to injury, Bonzi - the squeaky purple gorilla who was supposed to distract you from all of this bullshit - somehow managed to be even more obnoxious than Clippy. Long story short, it was one of these wonderful bits of early internet/early 2000s weirdness, but his ear-raking text-to-speech voice won't be missed.
In 8chanmania[edit | edit source]
Bonzi fought in 8chanmania XLII - not only in the ring, but also on the machine of TNA Anon, as the latter had installed a long-buried copy to overlay Bonzi unto the stream. Fortunately, the purple monstrosity was swiftly thrown out of the match by Immunity Doggo; once more proving that it confers immunity against everything.
