George Constanza

George Constanza
Lord of the Idiots
Birthday Unknown From Brooklyn, New York, USA Height N/A Weight N/A
Debut Match [[]] First Victory [[]] First Championship [[]]

"If she can't find me, she can't break up with me."

— George Constanza

George Louis Constanza is a character and the perhaps single best-known figure from the the American sitcom Seinefeld.

Bio

A man in his early thirties, George's childhood under his overbearing parents has left him as a living social disaster zone. Neurotic and wildly insecure about himself, his rare bursts of (over-)confidence when he tries to pick up a woman or attempts to secure some other advantage for himself almost invariably end with him being forced to hide his own shortcomings under layers upon layers of increasingly elaborate lies - until the entire mess comes crashing down on his head.

In 8chanmania

Season 1

As with many veterans that made their original appearance in the first season of 8chanmania, poor documentation means that it is currently unknown in which mania he made his debut, and in which mania he earned his first victory.

George's perhaps first apperance in the mania was during 8chanmania XX, where he formed a tag team with Tomoko Kuroki. Despite of their inital win against Bane & CIA, they quickly lost to the underhanded tactics of Masahiro Chono and Ryuji Goda.

He would later show up in 8chanmania XXII, where he faced Patrick Bateman but eventually lost the match via count-out (it should be noted that the count-out timer back then was at 15, rather than the modern 20 seconds).

In 8chanmania XXIV, Constanza had the debatable luck of getting matched up against Mazinkaiser during the preliminaries. Suffice it to say that things did not work out in his favor.

He also showed up for 8chanmania XXXII, but was immediately kicked out of the preliminaries by Dan Murphy.

Together with Tomoko, George Constanza also participated in the Tag Team Tournaments of 8chanmania XXXI, although the only information carried over from this event is them defeating Patchouli Knowledge and Koakuma.

Season 2

Already being sworn partners, George and Tomoko teamed up again for 8chanmania XLIV. Together, they defeated:

• Brit Crust and Tiff Crust
• Plum and Marina Liteyears
• Round Bear and Round Seal.

They eventually lost to Doomguy and Ranger, however.

He gave it another try at 8chanmania LI, but Mach Rider would have none of it and kicked him out during the preliminaries.

George would later team up with fellow womanizer Kenji Setou during 8chanmania LIII. He and his Japanese friend managed to outdo the two ladies Poli'ahu and Letty Whiterock, yet failed in the next round when they were overwhelmed by the written horror of H.P. Lovecraft and the horrible writing of Maya Tesch.

Constanza teamed up with Tomoko once more for 8chanmania LXV. The lack of charisma given form defeated Kazuma Kiryu and Ouya-tan, as well as Tatsumi Oga and Takashi Kamiyama, but eventually was subdued by Baba and Glitch Boss when George spent more time outside of the ring than was good for his team.

Season 3

Constanza and Tomoko gave it one last try in 8chanmania XCVIII. Unfortunately, a severe misunderstanding involving Bobby Hill, Hank Hill, and the fact that a balding, middle-aged man seemed so awfully close to an extremely nervous Japanese schoolgirl saw any potential chances of theirs turn to dust.

Trivia

• George has a keen interest in nice restrooms and claims to have an encyclopedic knowledge of the best public bathrooms in New York City.
• When Patchouli Knowledge attempted to inspect George's charisma with a spell, she briefly fell into a state of shock while babbling about an all-consuming black hole.
• During 8chanmania XLIV, he went berserk and landed KO'd both Plum and Marina Liteyears with critical weapons hit - a feat never seen before by any other wrestler.