Heinz Guderian
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Heinz Guderian was a German general and military strategist, often credited with inventing the concept of Blitzkrieg.
Bio[edit | edit source]
Having earned his first laurels during World War 1, Guderian was thoroughly fed up with anything resembling trench warfare. Instead, he envisioned a concept of highly mechanized, mobile warfare that would use motorized force to cut a breach into the enemy lines, move through it, and subsequently bitch-slap said enemy whenever he so much as tried to establish a new line of defense behind the resulting mayhem.
This push-and-shove sort of tactics proved terrifyingly effective against nations which were busily getting gang-banged on two fronts (i.e. Poland), nations that were still busy picking up the rubble (i.e. France), and nations that still relied on donkey-driven carts as the primary mode of transportation (i.e, Eastern Europe). It's primary drawback was that going SANIC FAST overwhelmed the enemy's logistics as much as it overwhelmed your own logistics, which can easily bite you in the arse if you're a) far away from home, and b) invade a relatively large country (i.e. Russia).
Following Germany's defeat in World War 2, Guderian spent three years in internment, and then wrote his memoirs. The latter helped to popularize him as a military genius, while also blaming all the atrocities of him and German Wehrmacht on the SS and the rest of Hitler's personal goonsquad. It worked surprisingly well, to the point that Guderian (and Rommel) are one of the few Nazis that you can praise without getting weird looks.
In 8chanmania[edit | edit source]
Heinz Guderian served as the manager of Yukari Akiyama during 8chanmania LXXXV. Whatever tactical advise he gave her immediately fell went straight to nothing when Yukari realized she was going to the fight the USS Iowa itself. Yukari's subsequent nerd-gasm ensured she lost the match, but she still got an autograph.
