Kain
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- "Vae victis!"
- — Kain
- — Kain
Kain is the eponymous protagonist of the Legacy of Kain series.
Bio[edit | edit source]
A young nobleman of no particular consequence in life, Kain lost the latter when he was killed in an ambush by bandits. When the necromancer Mortanius offered his tormented soul a chance for revenge, Kain immediately agreed without looking at the fine print; especially the part where it said he would be brought back to life as a blood-sucking, sun-averse abomination. He hoped to reverse this by visiting the epic world pillars, but found these hopelessly corrupted as each of their respective guardians had gone starkly insane. Thus began Kain's epic quest to kill the guardians and restore the pillars to save his dying world of Nosgoth.
Of course, there was bound to be even more fine print. While the death of the guardians restored eight of the nine pillars, Kain was soon told the final pillars would required his own valiant self-sacrifice (i.e., death) to be made whole again. Kain, having given it some thought, said "Fuck this", and instead turned the broken pillar into his bitching throne. This made him the de-facto ruler of Nosgoth, but also meant Nosgoth itself was rapidly turning into a barren wasteland.
The events that followed are too lengthy to discuss in detail here. Suffice it to say he came to regret throwing one of his guys down a well for growing fancy wings before he did, did his fair share of time-traveling, and gets tricked by ancient eldritch abominations nearly as often as he tries to trick others.
In 8chanmania[edit | edit source]
Season 2[edit | edit source]
Kain, teamed up with his lieutenant-turned-enemy-turned-ally Raziel, first debuted in 8chanmania XLIV. The vampire and the wraith were unimpressed by Fire Emblem's Robin and Chrom, but even their sharp fangs could not chew through the gum of Long Long Man and Tooru-Kun.
Season 3[edit | edit source]
In 8chanmania LXXXI, he retained his role as the manager of a rather unwilling Raziel.
The self-styled Lord of Nosgoth later appeared in the Square Enix-themed 8chanmania XCIV. He immediately clarified who was in charge by kicking Ansem out of the preliminaries and then doing the same thing with Sora one round later. During the quarter finals, Kain very nearly would have snacked on Tifa Lockhart before Raziel distracted him and gave the girl a chance to flee. Slightly irritated, Kain continued to bring the pain to Caim and ultimately met Morrie Mozzarella in the finals. A nasty crit later, Kain had his first belt.
Kain's first match in the grand finals of 8chanmania XCIX saw no-one other than the dreaded gap youkai Yukari Yakumo as his first opponent. Although he certainly won the initial battle of wits, Yukari's reality-warping powers eventually got the better of him - culminating in Kain presumably being run over when Yukari pulled Thomas the Train Engine from one of her gaps.
Kain's epilogue explained that he returned to Nosgoth, but where he hitherto was certain it was Nosgoth itself that had been too flawed to save, he now was no longer certain whether the flaw didn't lie with somebody else.
In 8chanmania C[edit | edit source]
In 8chanmania C, Kain and Dracula came to blows over the question who of them had created the superior vampire line. Kain answered it by wiping the floor with Dracula, and when the other bloodsucker proposed having a second match between his apparent granddaughter Remilia Scarlet and Kain's own spawn Raziel, the superiority of Kain's bloodline was confirmed once more.