Saint Nicholas of Myra
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Nicholas of Bari Nicholas the Wonderworker | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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Saint Nicholas of Myra was an early Christian bishop, and origin of the legend of Santa Claus.
Bio[edit | edit source]
Supposedly born to rich Christian parents in what then was the Roman province of Lycia and Pamphylia, giving a precise historic account of Saint Nicholas is difficult because the Church (following established doctrine) only wrote his biography centuries after his death, made half of it up, and then copy-pasta'd the rest straight from The Life of Apollonius of Tyana.
While attributed with several saintly deeds, the most popular and lasting tale about Saint Nicholas involved him secretly throwing bags of gold through the windows of an impoverished family so that its daughters wouldn't have to turn to prostitution. That the whole story could also be read as a clandestine way to pay for services rendered is probably coincidental, as this happened well before he became Bishop of Myra.
In 8chanmania[edit | edit source]
Saint Nicholas fought in the Christmas-themed 8chanmania LXXIV; and was severely pissed over how his legend has been bastardized for commercial purposes. This set him up for a natural grudge match against Santa Claus, but Santa was wise in the way of the merchants, and immediately tricked Saint Nicholas into beign disqualified through a chair trick.
Trivia[edit | edit source]
- Aside from the tale of the three daughters, Saint Nicholas also was known for miracles such as restoring the bodily integrity of three children after they had been turned into mincemeat during a famine, and chopping down a tree possessed by a demon.
- He is the patron saint of people ranging from children and toymakers to sailors, repentant thieves and, obviously, prostitutes.