Goff Rokka
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Goff Rockaz are a (sadly retconned) type of Ork oddboyzs from the old days of Warhammer 40.000's first edition.
Bio[edit | edit source]
A contemporary to the 80s Noise Marine, Goff Rockaz were oddboys from the eponymous Goffs tribe that spent less time smashing humies and more time smashing the strings of their Mek-built "machine gun guitars" instead. Easily recognizable by their flamboyant hair squigs and their bulky leather jackets, the Rockaz provided ear-deafening "Goffic Rock" for both entertainment and military purposes - which boils down to the same thing for the Orkz anyway.
Particularly lucky and/or talented Rockaz might draw the interest of an influential Waaaghboss. The latter would not only supply them with enough teef to buy all the squig beer they could ever hope to drink, but could even lead to their creations being broadcasted across prospective battlefields from gigantic, Gargant-mounted loudspeakers.
In 8chanmania[edit | edit source]
The Goff Rocka debuted in 8chanmania LXXIX. He wasted no time to kick the ass of Joseph Stalin, but sadly was thrown out by Indiana Jones one round later.
The Goff Rokka would appear alongside the 80s Noise Marine in a tag team 8chanmania LXXXVII. Their rock was louder than the constant screaming of Lost Soul and Beheaded Kamikaze; they showed Glitch Boss and Special Snowflake that "being special" usually is meant as an euphemism, bested Rance and Stork (with the Noise Marine notably trying to confiscate Rance's "demon weapon" before being pulled off by his partner), and earned their tickets to the finals by glassing Master Chief and Noble Six. That the Glam Rocker and the Goff Rokka eventually saw defeat at the hands of Dr. Morbis and Nemesis was not exactly well-received.
Taking his last chance to rock in 8chanmania XCVIII, the Goff Rokka once more teamed up with the 80s Noise Marine. Their initial match against the WWEW Soldier and his Blood Eagle buddy was a textbook example of a hype match, and could have gone literally anywhere if Blood Eagle would not have suffered a spontaneous brain aneurysm that prevented him from doing anything useful while the Rokka pinned his partner. Sadly, being superhuman monsters and having a superior taste of music somehow was not enough to let them win their next fight against Senator Armstrong and his niece Abby Anderson, with Abby KO'ing the Noise Marine in the middle of the match.
